Insanity.


My 2004 Pontiac Sunfire, which for those of you who have been paying attention to this 'blog and my real life rants, was both an incredible gift from my father/stepmother, and the fucking bane of my existence. Kath and Dad paid for it in full, in my name, on Christmas Eve Day of 2003. Since that day, it has been slowly falling apart. The list of things that went wrong is too long to re-type now, but ranged from the comical (driver's side door falling off . . . twice) to the horrific (total brake system failure, no cause ever found). Ultimately though, the thing's failure was its complete uselessness as a family car. [info]starfish12 and I had decided to trade it in while someone would still give us something for it, and we could buy a new family car for her, and I'll commute in her old Olds.


Now, most recently I posted about how the SUnfire's window went down and then failed to come back up. Well, today I took the pile down to the dealership (in Flint--yes, nigh-on an hour of freeway driving with the window down). While it was in service getting checked out, I asked my salesperson to run figures for a Pontiac Vibe.


The Vibe, you see, is really a Toyota Matrix. GM literally buys Matrixes (Matrices?) from Toyota and puts a Pontiac skin on them. So, it's got a Toyota engine, frame, etc.; in fact it's pretty much all Toyota. However, I qualify for GM Friends and Family discount through my Stepmom's mother, so the GM version was looking attractive. Well, the salesperson ran the numbers, and including about $1000 worth of incentives that expired TODAY (President's Day Sale, you know), I could get this Vibe they had on the lot for $3500 under sticker price. Wow. It was equipped exactly as we wanted--manual transmission, power windows and doors, CD, air, cruise and NOTHING ELSE. No premium packages, no lame accessories, just the raw car with appropriate amenities. She asked me if I wanted to test drive it while they valuated my car for trade-in and got the estimate done on the window. I said sure. Now, I'd driven an automatic Vibe before, but the manual was much more impressive. Steering feel is tight, steady, and communicative (though not necessarily quick), the clutch was quick and sensitive, and the shifter throws were shortish and solid. Certainly no speed demon, but enough power to pass and take on ramps with a bit of vigor. On top of it all, the thing is rated at 30 mpg city/36 highway That's REALLY impressive for a five-door crossover vehicle. Well, just as I was pulling it back onto the lot, my cell rang. It was the service guy, telling me it would be $501.00 to make the damn Sunfire window go up and down again.


Oh HELL no.


Pretty much at that point, I felt a very strong desire to never drive that damned car ever again. Before I got too hot and bothered, though, I called Kelly and got her opinion on the subject. We knew we liked the Matrix/Vibe, and Kelly was just as eager to ditch the Sunfucker as I was. Though she was a little leery of the whole situation, she gave me the greenlight to go forward, for the time being.


(insert all kinds of drama and histrionics here, including, but not limited to: them kinda dicking me on the value of my trade-in, being on the phone with Kelly every ten minutes trying to coordinate everything for HER new car while SHE was an hour away, buying new insurance, cleaning out my trashed car, trying to get my father or stepmother on the phone, applying for financing . . . )


So miraculously, with my terrible credit, no money down, and less trade than I thought I'd have . . . they approved my application. Through GMAC. At a decent rate. HOLY SHIT! This kind of a loan is going to do wonders for my heinous credit, and really be a great stepping stone towards us getting a house. Major props to the finance lady who pulled some strings to get it done, especially on a time crunch. Oh, I did mention I had to be back in Lansing by 6:30 for Dominic's appointment, right?


Fast forward to 5:30ish, I'm cleaning out my car, signing paperwork, draining my phone battery talking to everyone on the planet, and Kelly's trying to get the kids ready for Dominic's doctor's appointment--total hysteria. Finally, I get the keys, I get the temp plates, I pat the Sunfire goodbye, I load up my stuff, and off I go. Oh look, a voicemail from my dad.


"Hey, Ty, this is Dad. Go fuck yourself, and I'll see you in hell."


Okay, not quite, but that was the gist. He said he wasn't going to let me use the discount, for no particular reason other than we're not as tight as we could be. This is a bit of a pisser because I am fucking rolling down the road in a car I just bought assuming that shit was all cool. I called the salesperson, and she assured me that we'd get it worked out, especially since we may be able to qualify for the discount through Kelly's mom's side of the family. Nice to know one of our sets of parents doesn't hate us. Is patricide still a crime? It's a good thing I had some Rage Against the Machine albums with me.


So anyway, after it's all said and done, the ride is in the driveway, and the ink on all the details will be dry in the morning. I leave you with these: