I'm about to spin you a tale, a fable, a story. It's the story of the complete incompetance of a Honda Dealer. Specifically, Dow Honda in Ottawa.



On Sunday afternoon, I turned left in my other girlfriend, my coveted 2003 Acura RSX. And heard a grinding, metal-on-metal noise. I turned the stereo off, and made the same left turn again. Nope, not a phantom sound. [info]idioglossia turns to me and says "I didn't want to tell you that I'd heard it.".



So, I check my sources. I know the brakes are really close to done. First thought is, it's a wear pin getting close, when I load up the corner (right corner, turning left) it pushes everything over just enough to make it scrape. Makes sense, fo'sho. Stop at Parts Source on Bank street, and pick up a set of front brake pads. They go in the trunk, I go home. I have no time until Tuesday. Tuesday, I take the afternoon off, borrow [info]mcswooney and [info]mightydogking's driveway, nd get to work. Brakes are EASY. The shims are pretty burnt out, but still usable, and it's better than a $60 'hardware' kit, which costs more than the pads themselves do. Take the car out. Run it up and down the street jamming on the brakes a few times to seat the pads.



Turn the left corner.



Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.



Well, shit. Still there.



So, it's definitely not the pads. What else could it be?



Did some research, asked a few people, looked at some forums. My car has some occasional/minor driveshaft issues; it could be a bearing. It could be shock absorber. It could be a rotor. It's time for professional help.



Which is when the trouble really starts.



5pm Tuesday July 29th



I don't know the rep of any of the Honda dealers in Ottawa, so, I google them, and pick the closest. That's Dow Honda. Talk to [info]idioglossia, she decides she's going to bail on work, and come with me. We pull in. She looks at me and says "Last few turns, I've not heard it". I was thinking the same thing, so I pull out, pull into the parking lot next door, and make a left-hand U-turn. Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. There it is.



Go into the service department. The guy tells me, that yes, they are really busy. I say Hey, that's ok, I understand. We agree to have me leave the car there, they'll fit it in if someone else doesn't show up, etc, but they'll FOR SURE have it done for me by Friday, to go up to the cottage. Specifically, they'll do the diagnostic/test-drive, isolate the problem, and then call me with an estimate. When I OK that, they'll do the work. "Perfect" says I, and we walk home.



I'd kinda hoped I'd have call by 9pm that night (four hours later) but there wasn't one. Ok, no problem.



7am Wednesday July 30th



Get up, go to work, start expecting a phone call. No phone calls. I leave work at 3pm, Get home. By 5:30pm I'm getting pretty annoyed, they've had the car twenty-four hours, it's late on Wednesday, I figured they'd at least have had time to look, so that they can quote me, get the go-ahead, and get any parts in that they need, to do the work on Thursday.



5:45pm Wednesday July 30th



Call the dealership. Get a very nice reception girl on the line. She transfers me to Service. The phone rings and rings. She comes back on, offers to transfer me to the voicemail at service. I thank her, and leave a detailed message asking what's going on, how they can contact me, and once again re-iterating my time table.



8:45pm Wednesday July 30th



Having not received a return call three hours later, I call them again. I get the same polite, friendly reception girl, who transfers me to Service again, where I get the same ring, ring, ring, no answer. She transfers me to voicemail, I leave another message.



I'm now pretty iritated. I can live with them having issues, or with them not having had time to get me in yet, but by the time I've made arrangements for them to call me, and then left two messages that have gone unanswered, I'm starting to feel annoyed and uncomfortable with these guys working on my car.



7am Thursday July 31st



Back at work, it's now 38 hours since I dropped my car off, there has been not a word in return to the two messages. Their service department is open 6:30am to 9pm, it's why I chose them, to be honest. I decide to wait until 10ish, then call 'em and see what the hell's going on.



9:45ish, Thursday July 31st



And the fun begins.



I call them, and actually get a live body. I explain the situation, and my displeasure with the fact that not only have they not contacted me like they were supposed to, but they also haven't returned any of my calls. He then explains to me that a] "It's an Acura. Our Honda techs aren't trained to work on those, so it's unlikely they'll be able to diagnose anything even if; b] They had even brought it into the shop, which they had not. c] They probably can't get parts for it. Additionally, d] They have a ten-day backlog of work-orders and it's highly unlikely that they'll be able to get to it by Friday, even just to look at it. e] comes soon, and it's a good one.



I explain my thoughts on the matter: specifically, I'd like to know exactly how their ability to work on various cars has degraded since I brought it in two days ago, having changed from "No problem" to "We're not competent to work on Acura's"[1]. Additionally, I'd like to know how they don't have time for me, and have developed a ten day backlog of workorders, since I brought my car in on Tuesday, and was told that "there was no problem getting it done by Friday". There's an answer to this.



It's e]. "I'm[2] not responsible for what one of the other guys tells you".



And really, we now have a problem.



Because, on top of lying to me, I'm pretty sure that his sole job is to be responsible for what the guys in the shop, and on the service desk, say and do. If one of them made claim that wasn't accurate, at the end of the day, that's his problem. It surely isn't mine. When you add on the rest of the bullshit (we can't work on anything except cars with Honda badges, we don't/then/do have a ten day backlog, etc, I'm now officially pissed off.



I explain to him, that I don't really care. I appreciate they're busy, but that's not my problem. They made a commitment, and them accomplishing that, for me, is all I care about. If they weren't capable of making the commitment, they shouldn't have done so. If they'd have told me on Tuesday they could not work on the car, and they didn't have time, I would have thought it strange, as it is actually a Honda, but if they're booked up, that's fine, I'll find a way to make other plans and/or make an appointment to get it fixed when they're quieter. I wouldn't have left my car there for two days, untouched. More importantly, I'd have been able to make other arrangements for my vacation on the weekend, which is now in danger of being cancelled[3]. Had they been honest up front, or even called me to change the situation, OR actually returned my phone calls, this could all have been averted. I could have arranged a car rental. Does he think I can rent a car now, a day before the long, holiday weekend? Unlikely, I tell him, before he can get a word in. Do they normally make a habit of either lying to their customers, or employing service guys who don't really know what's going on in the shop? (that's a no-win question)?



What I got, for my polite-yet-annoyed tirade was a lot of apologies, but not a lot of action.



11:53am Thursday July 31st



My phone rings. I have the ringer turned off, so I miss it, being hard at work. It goes to voicemail. It's Sunny. SUnny is the guy I dropped the car off with, originally. I call the dealership, get the same bright, chipper reception girl. Does she never leave?? She transfers me directly to Sonny, in the service department. This is NOT the service manager.



Miraculously, they've found time to get a mechanic in my car, and they've taken it out for a test drive. They can't recreate the sound, so as far as they're concerned, there's no problem. I says, "really?". Really.



At this point, we all know it's important to not burn the bridges completely. Now, I know that sound is there. [info]idioglossia heard it too. My bullshit-o-meter is going off. I thank Sonny for making the effort, and for getting someone to take the car out nd check it out. I really appreciate that, especially when their busy, and it does a lot to rebuild the communication. However.



(Yes, that's a "but" in fancy language)



I also appreciate that they're only charging me $50 for diagnostic, rather than the shop $90-$100. This also sets off warning bells for me. Says "despite the trouble, lets get him out of here happy-ish". And they were really busy. And they didn't find the problem, or even acknowledge its existence. In fact, they denied there was a problem. What to do, what to do?



OK. Thank you, and I'll come pick the car up at 3:15-3:30, when I'm done work. OH, and just to be sure, because I'm concerned about the safety of myself and my passengers over the weekend: I'd like documentation saying you didn't find a problem. Also, I'd like a mechanic to take a two minute drive with me, during which time, I'll generate the noise. Then, we'll discuss what I owe you for 'diagnostic'.



As you can tell by now, I don't actually believe they checked it out. "Sonny" was extremely non-commital about having a mechanic available. That's ok. I won't be leaving the shop until this happens. And I have no problem telling them that I think they're lying about having taken it out at all.



HOwever, that'll have to wait, as it's now 2:32pm, and I'll be leaving work very shortly. Stay tuned for the "final showdown".



3:17pm Thursday July 31st



How did I know this would happen?



I got in there, and the guy recognizes me immediately. Calls me by name (And not Mr.) and goes to get the bill. He goes into the shop to look for a mechanic (I must admit, he did this without prompting again.) And says "he's not available, he's really busy, there's nothing else I can do". To which I reply (admittedly confrontational) to the tune of: Well, this is very simple. Either he didn't do his job (you guys didn't send him out in the car) or he didn't do his job properly. Either way, I won't be paying this bill. If I do pay this bill, as is, I want to know that you are saying my car is SAFE. Because that's why I brought it in. There's a noise, I'm not 100% certain it's a good one, and you're telling me there's no problem. If there's no problem, it's safe. If it's safe, and something happens because you missed the problem, I'm holding YOUR COMPANY responsible.



The response to that was a lot of hmming and haaaing, and explaining that that wasn't really fair (not how it wasn't fair, just that it wasn't fair). I kept reiteratting that they were asking me to pay for a service. If they say the service is done, and they missed something, they're responsible, that sounds pretty simple to me.



After five minutes of this, the Service Manager, NOT Sonny, comes out, introduces himself, and starts explaining about noises that Acura's make that Honda's don't, etc, etc. I call him on bullshit, and say, look, I can take you out in the car, and the very first left turn I take, it'll screech. He says, finally, "well, ok, Sir (that's important), we can do that, but that's going to be about all I can do". For now, I can live with that.



Back out of "get my shit done" mode, I talk to the guy. I get him laughing "Hey, I know what it's like to work service. I've worked service. There's pissy customers. And currently, I'm being a pissy customer. I know I am, but this is a big deal, and I want to make sure that a] the car is safe, and b] I've not thrown the diagnostic money away on no real work."



Take the first corner out.



Screeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.



He looks at me and says: "I heard that".



Finally.



We head back into the parking lot, and he walks me around the car, showing me the problem. It's pretty simple: I need new rotors. There's a big long reason for it, but at the end of the day, the rotors are worn enough they've rust on the edges, which is contacting with the wear-pins (squealer bar) on the brake pads, and making it noisy. I either need the rotors machined, or replaced.



And that's when I said, (approximately) "now, that's what I wanted. Now, I'm happy to pay the money: there was a problem, you've reassured me, you've told me what I need to get done, and that I'm ok for the short term."



How fucking hard was THAT?



If his guys on the desk, and his mechanics, ahd done their jobs properly to begin with, it wouldn't have needed to be escalated to the level that it reached. If they'd have not lied to me to start with; if they'd returned my calls, if they'd have actually paid attention to the big "EXCELL" plaque on the wall behind them explaining how Honda's service and customer relations worked (everything they didn't do was at the top of the list on that plaque), they'd have been fine.



I have to find the name of the service manager. He did his job spectacularly well. I didn't give him a lot of choice, but he did a good job. But the service desk guy? Uselsess. and that one guy has ensured I will never use Dow Honda again. It's really, really easy for a business to burn bridges, and especially right now, an automotive dealer, no matter what brand, cannot, cannot, CANNOT afford to do so. The industry is tanking, and service will become the be all and end all.



That said, while the car needs some attention, it's fine to drive this weekend. I may even find some parts before we go, and do the work up at the cottage with Jay: although there's no reason I can't do 'em myself over the remainder of the summer.



So, [info]yumikid, [info]mr_bundy, [info]mightdogking, back to the original Meet-at-Ikea plan?



And anyone else who's driving up there (lj user="agingcusahack"&gt; and [info]notmikesince91 I'm looking at you guys) who wants to wagon train: Ikea @ 5:30! Then, ONWARDS!







[1] For those who don't know, Acura is built on the same lines as Honda's. Half the parts say "Honda" on them. My RSX is actually, at it's bones and heart, a Civic SI(R) depending on what trim RSX you drive. So, that particular line is bullshit.

[2] "I'm" in the case, the Service Manager: the guy who runs the shop.

[3] Not exactly true. We're still gonig to the cottage, but it's going to be very cramped with [info]idioglossia and me in [info]mr_bundy and [info]yumikid's little civic, and our gear in [info]mightydogking's car.